Reflections of loneliness , love and boredom ..

(Reflection 1) ... Its 5:50 p.m. , 10 more minutes to pass and the day is over . She grabbed her handbag, went to her friend on the office across the hall, asked her what’s she’s up to this evening? her friend had some family related issue .So her company offer was denied . Smiling at her, she wished her colleague friend a nice evening , and headed to the elevator , back to home ..

(Reflection 2) ... 10:15 p.m. , his friend’s name blinking all over his mobile screen , he picked up the call , his friend asked him if he’s free tonight for their usual late night coffee ,drive and chat session .. he answered in surrender “yeah.. sure”. It was his choice to go out in that routine drive or to not , though , whether this or that , it all had the same taste , nothing really special ..

(Reflection 3)... It was approaching 9:30 when he looked at his watch, he was still in the office , digging between papers , trying to finish that work proposal , he didn’t feel time , it’s not that he enjoys his work to the extent to forget the outer world .. though, his world , inner and outer has became work .. everything seems the same , he felt alone whether between papers or people .

(Reflection 4) ... As the customer reached for his pocket, she asked “VISA or Cash sir ?” he answered VISA , she smiled automatically as he given her the card , she drew the money , gave it back to him , with his bag of purchases and waited for the next . The man , didn’t even bother to eye contact her .But she’s used to that . It’s part of the job, to practice being a talking piece of furniture, whenever required.

(Reflection 5)... The waiter came with the orders tray , she had her lemon mint juice , the girls around her were loud and laughs-full , everybody seemed to have a good time , she seemed to have a good time too , still , she didn’t know why that agitating feeling of nonexistence wrapped her even as she smiled at their jokes .


(Reflection 6) ... It’s almost noon , she has been staring at her computer screen for the past 4 hours , faking work , trying to read her work emails , forming the replies , without any success finishing anything . Her mind is diving somewhere out of this small cubical, somewhere sunny , breezy with a view to clear her tired eyes , mind and heart . and it wouldn’t harm if she met someone in that breezy sunny place , and it wouldn’t be too bad if it turned out to be the one . she sighed , and went back into staring at her computer screen.

(Reflection 7)...Dancing with the rhythm, his arms twirling her, she gave him big smile and moved along , the second the music changed he nodded his head , and went back to his seat leaving her dancing with another cousin in the wedding , giggles and laughs all around , his mother winking him with agreement about that girl , but his mind was away , far away with someone he didn’t meet yet , a lady he imagined to spend his life with , yet , he doesn’t seem to find her , anywhere .

Imperfections.. spices of personality

So .. its about time for another post .. been a while .. hasn’t it ?!

My friend and I were having a cozy chat the other day over some coffee , in the middle of the conversation , she said something that made me think , she said , people ,tend to look up the faults and imperfections instead of appreciating the personalization of flaws .

Humans .. are perfectionists by nature , we all aspire to get the perfect education , the perfect job , the perfect car , the perfect life and the perfect partner , its in our genes , but , when we look closer , we see that our lives and choices are further away from perfect , we try , we put the guidelines , and we take a look , then study , and measure , assess the good and bad , and then we announce our verdict .

It could be a valid procedure, when it comes to things that we buy , eventually , we need the value of our purchases to match what we have paid . But, when its non-purchasable value or entity, does the same method apply? As in , choosing friends or more precisely life partners ? Is it the same when we choose people whom we may think of as a possible partner? or is that if we fell in love , we no longer see imperfections ,We simply see what we want to see and forget all about those flaws we usually think of as a deal breaker ? So ,if its love , then no imperfections would be visible . But again, falling in love is the perfect case of finding the life partner, because , the real things is , far , far away ..

The thing is .. as we walk along the path of our lives ,and as we make our decisions , scan and sort people out , we should remember a small thing , that even though we aspire and believe that we deserve perfection in all what we intend to have and live with .. that still, we , ourselves, are far away from perfect .And that flaw s, those small imperfections ,personalizes us , as well as those around us , differentiate us and makes us simply , more spicy , unique and special .

Almost back ,,,

In a couple of months it will be almost a year .. Since the last time I typed a post and blogged it .. Why did I stop ? Was I too busy to blog ? well, at first yes , for a while I was overwhelmed with work and life , I couldn’t post anything and I also couldn’t read my favorite blogs . It could be bad time management issue as well .. of course , later on , things got calmer , and I felt guilty for not blogging anymore , and for some reason I felt like I lost my blogging sense ..

So! What have I been up to for the past year? well , had a busy year at work , and a busy summer , spent a cool vacation in Syria , Cairo , Petra & RUM . Autumn was kind of depressing on all levels, socially and work wise, for some reason I was relieved that 2007 came to an end, and looking forward for a new fresh start with 2008. Unfortunately , 2008 did not start as good as I anticipated , mid January , I got my car glass’s broken , and my laptop robbed from my car , while I was buying something from a nearby home Supermarket , the bad thing was , I did not have a backup for my work , but I could manage eventually . So that was the first incident! During February , I got almost mugged by two men while withdrawing money from a main street ATM , if it wasn’t for God’s mercy I would’ve had my money & probably my car stolen from me . Will tell you the full story in another post, apparently, this kind of robbery is a trend lately in Amman with prices inflation, so be aware!

I feel like I missed a lot in blogging world , and I feel out of practice , that’s why I hesitated to write again , and whenever I received another heartwarming comment from my friends among bloggers , I felt the urge to write again , and tonight I just did . My fingers feel rusty and my stream of thoughts is still a bit frozen , but I guess it’s a matter of couple of posts , and hopefully I’ll be back on track .

Thank you all .. I guess I am back!